TQ is a big boy in my class.  He has a wonderful sense of humor and an extreme sense of laziness.  I really like him but I wish he would do some of his work on time.  Today, I found out why he is like he is.  His mom came in for a parent conference and she sat there and raked him down even when I complimented him for things.

It isn't that TQ isn't smart.  It isn't that TQ is naughty.  It is just that his parents use threats to discipline their children and beat their self esteem to a pulp.  Everything that happens to him is a negative.  I did my best to talk about the positive things and Mom just kept reminding him how "lazy" he was.  I will have to put in a great deal of effort to make sure he has a positive year.  Every child deserves to have someone tell him how wonderful he is.

It really worries me when parents are critical and negative.  I was brought up by parents who loved the stuffing out of us but my Dad could never give us a compliment to our faces.  He would tell others but never us.  I tried really hard to make him proud of me and it was only a few years ago when I realized he was but couldn't bring himself to say it to our faces.  I no longer carry that burden.  I want to help TQ to be able to see the positive things he can do.  I want him to know that he is smart and beautiful and wonderful too.  Even if it only sticks for this year, I want him to proud of himself.  It will be a real struggle to battle against the negative home environment.

TQ has the potential to be a fantastic student.  How do you break the cycle of criticism and make a 10 year old see that there is nothing he can't do?  Today was his birthday and still him Mom made him feel awful.  It just wasn't fair.